The road to recovery
by LMXB
Summary: Set just after All About Eve the group struggles to move on, whilst Julia desperately seeks a cure.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Earth2 or the characters portrayed in it

**A/N: **Hi, this is a standalone story set a few days after All about Eve. It is my take on how Devon could have been cured and the cost to the group. It will be mainly J/A, but all the characters will feature in it. It is a work in progress (I aim for updates go up in a timely manner), so if anyone has any criticism or comments regarding the story or my portrayal of the characters please get in touch.

* * *

_-voice of John Danziger-_

_It has been nine days, seven hours and twenty long minutes since we confined Devon to the status chamber. In that time hope has faded faster than the morale. No one speaks anymore, no one wants to go, instead everyone waits, everyone that is but Uly, Alonzo and Julia. While Uly and Alonzo try and fail to contact the Terrians, Julia slaves away all day and all night testing theories and looking for clues, striving to find the answer we pray for. Despite her work, no progress has been made and as each minute passes we are being forced towards leaving Devon and pressing on to New Pacifica. If we leave we risk Devon's life further by the old ship giving up and loosing power, by roaming Grendlers or penal colonists destroying the systems or by some unconsidered risk. Yet if we don't go on we risk the lives of everyone on that Colony ship. I know that if we do press on Julia's productivity will drop and we reduce the chance of saving Devon. I know that both Julia and Uly will fight any decision to move. But ultimately as much as it hurts it is the right thing to do and the only option we really have. That is why it will not go to a vote. This evening I''ll announce my decision to the group, in two days if Julia has not found anything we move on. At least that way it is me alone who will have to shoulder the responsibility of leaving her alone, frozen in time at the mercy of this planet._

"Hey Julia." Danziger said entering the Med-tent.

"John." Julia replied without looking up from her workbench.

"How's it going?"

"Still nothing." Julia said, her voice quivering with frustration. "I'm sorry."

"You're doing the best you can Julia." Danziger said, trying to comfort her. "You should get some food."

"I'm ok at the moment. I need to finish these tests first." Julia replied, still without looking up. Danziger looked down at the doctor, considering his options. Finally Danziger said.

"Look Julia there is a group meeting tonight and it kind of concerns you. I know you'll want to keep working so I'm going to tell you now so not to interfere with your work." The mechanic started before sighing. "I know you have done your best, but our priority has to be towards those families on the colony ship. In two days we move on. Maybe away from here Lonz will have better luck reaching the Terrians." Julia, still without looking up, opened her mouth to reply but she knew he was right. She had failed there was nothing she could do. So she just silently worked whilst Danziger looked on with worry and sympathy. Not knowing what to say he just turned and left.

As night continued to fall across camp Julia went through sample after sample, test after test trying to find the cause of Devon's illness. Everyone may have lost faith in her, but she couldn't give up, not yet. Shutting her eyes in frustration instead of seeing blackness she saw rows of numbers, the echoes of all the results from the tests she had already run. She sighed, frustrated, she knew the answer must be somewhere, she just couldn't find it. She was failing, but she had never failed. She hadn't been made and raised for failure. It was this alien feeling of failing that was eating away at her.

She stood in order to get another sample, but as she did so black spots appeared in front of her and the room spun causing her to sit back down again. Shaking the foggy feeling clear she looked at the flap of the Med-tent and considered getting something to eat. Her body clearly needed it. But she couldn't face seeing everyone. Instead she looked back down at her tests and tried to focus. She was, however, so tired that she could not concentrate. She felt her eyelids become heavy and cursed her weakness. She reached to the side of her workbench to her supply of stimulants. But as her hand hovered over the supply she shook her head and slowly stood, she had already taken too many. Fresh air would have to do. When she was on her feet and confident she would not collapse she slowly made her way to the Med-tent flap. Looking round camp she saw a path, free of the colonists, leading out to a ridge and a bush filled area. Checking the path was clear once more she walked away from camp into the darkness and the solitude. She wasn't sure how far she walked when her legs finally gave up causing her to collapse to her knees.

Crumpled on the floor the previous sleepless, stressful days of failure caught up with her and she could no longer keep her emotions in check. What she didn't know as she kneeled sobbing and shaking was that she was not alone.


	2. Chapter 2

The Martins had left the camp for a walk away from the others. Morgan's pessimistic attitude was causing everyone to get on edge and for his own safety Bess had dragged him off into the darkness.

"Why don't they understand we need to leave here?" Morgan complained.

"Devon's our friend, we can't abandon her." Bess said slowly.

"She'd want us to go on. There is nothing we can do for her. Her only hope is Julia and she has nothing. If we head to New Pacifica we can return for her with help, with proper medical equipment and with doctors who have a clue."

"Julia is doing her best." Bess chastised her husband.

"Which is blatantly not good enough."

"Morgan!"

"I not saying it's her fault. But face it there is nothing she can so. She is out of her depth. We all are."

"Shhh." Bess hissed tugging on her husband's arm.

"What?" Morgan whispered back.

"Do you hear that?" Bess asked in a hushed voice.

"Hear wh... is someone crying?"

"This way." Bess whispered

"Maybe we shouldn't." Morgan hissed as he was dragged along.

As the noise got louder Bess slowed down and the Martin's creeped forward until they could see the cause of the noise. When they saw Julia crumpled on the floor they stood shocked and unable to move. Eventually Morgan opened and closed his mouth a few times pointing towards Julia, but still unable to say anything. Finally Bess turned to Morgan and whispered

"Go back to camp and get Alonzo. But don't tell anyone why. Now!" Obediently Morgan nodded and scurried back to camp as Bess moved towards Julia.

Waiting until she was next to the doctor Bess crouched down and gently placed her hand on Julia's back causing the young medic to flinch.

"Julia, it's Bess. What's wrong?"

Instead of answering, Julia tried to cover her face and wipe away her tears. However, she could not control her emotions and continued to sob. Her inability to stop crying making her more and more upset. Worried by what was making Julia, of all people, so upset, Bess wrapped her arm round the doctor and tried to soothe her. But every word and act of comfort seemed to drive Julia further and further over the edge. Finally, through a breaking, unsteady voice Julia began to apologise.

"My fault. Devon's going to be abandoned, left alone because of me."

"What do you mean?" Bess asked confused.

Julia said something in response but her words were lost in her sobs and Bess could not understand so instead she kept trying to comfort the doctor.

Back at camp Danziger had gone round assembling everyone for a meeting. A meeting that everyone knew was coming, a meeting where everyone knew what would be discussed, but a meeting no one wanted to go to. As he made his way to Alonzo who sat with a MagPro, looking out for danger, he saw Alonzo's normally cheerful and optimistic expression turn to worry.

"Can't we-" The pilot started.

"You know we need to move on Solace." Danziger said grimly as Morgan sprinted towards the pair.

"Alonzo, I need you to come with me." Morgan said panting.

"Martin now's not the time." Danziger growled.

"Yes it is." Morgan said, his voice so certain it surprised Danziger.

"What's going on?" Alonzo questioned.

"I'll tell you, but not here." Morgan said his eyes pleading with Alonzo to come. "It's really important, kinda like a medical emergency." He added stressing the word 'medical' hoping Alonzo would piece things together.

"Wouldn't Julia be a better choice then." Danziger asked suspiciously.

"She's already there." Morgan said carefully.

"Go." Danziger barked. "Be quick." He added not wanting to delay his news for much longer.

As Alonzo hurried after Morgan he asked.

"What's really going on?"

"It's Julia." Morgan explained. "She's lost it."

"Lost it?" Alonzo asked. "What do you mean lost it?"

"Trust me it'll be easier if you see for yourself." Morgan said. "We should hurry." He added as he scampered off, leaving a confused and concerned Alonzo to follow.

"Why are you stopping?" Alonzo asked as he nearly ran into the back of a now stationary Morgan.

"Need to listen....for that. This way." He said running off again.

"Listen for what?" Alonzo questioned as he set off in pursuit of Morgan. Finally Morgan stopped again and pointed towards a bush.

"There." He exclaimed causing Alonzo to suspiciously move towards the bush and peer beyond the foliage.

"Julia?" Alonzo questioned as he saw her shaking body. Looking over Julia's head Bess locked eyes with Alonzo and beckoned him over. When Alonzo was next to Julia Bess removed her arm and backed away from the pair, retreating towards her husband.

"Julia, what's wrong?" Alonzo asked when he felt Julia calming in his arms.

"I failed. I'm meant to help, but I failed."

"You haven't failed. Devon is still alive. We are still alive." Alonzo said, holding Julia tight, as the Martin's disappeared into the shadows.

"Eben isn't." She replied sobbing. "I can't face it anymore. Whenever I leave the tent people look at me with hope, then when they realise what a failure I am that hope turns to despair, all because of me."

"No Julia." Alonzo said tightening his grip on Julia, trying to comfort her, but not knowing what to say. Inwardly cursing his lack of ability to comfort Julia, he rocked her in his arms trying to comfort her, telling her it was not her fault.


	3. Chapter 3

"Morgan honey what's wrong?" Bess asked noticing her husband was more agitated than normal.

"Do you think....um what I mean is....is Julia nuts?"

"No sweetheart." Bess said. "I think the pressure is getting to her." She said sitting on the cot next to Morgan and placing a comforting hand on his forearm.

"Please, she is a chromo-tilt she's practically programmed not to feel emotions." Morgan replied.

"She's a human just like you and me. You can't program a human not to feel emotions." Bess pointed out.

"Ok fine, up until a short while ago she was an ice queen."

"Morgan!" Bess exclaimed.

"What? There is no point sugar coating it. Anyway my point is do you think she is still capable of being a doctor?"

"Are you ill Morgan?" Bess asked feeling concerned.

"No. Why do I look ill? What is it? Have I lost weight? Do I look gaunt?" Morgan asked, allowing his hypercondria to get the better of him.

"No Morgan, you look fine." Bess assured him. "I was just wondering why you were worried about Julia."

"I think I've found something." Morgan said as he started to pace in their tent.

"What kind of something?"

"It could help Devon."

"It could? Why didn't you tell me? Why do you look like it is a bad thing?"

"It might not, there might not be anything to it and I didn't want to build your hopes up. Besides even if I am right it might not help."

"But there might?" Bess asked beginning to get excited.

"Possibly, but I would need to tell Julia and what if causes her to well you know go all emotional again?"

"Morgan, Julia was upset as she is carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders. She can't cure Devon and feels like a failure. If you have something that might help you would be helping Julia as well as Devon."

"What if she looses it again?" Morgan asked, clearly not comfortable with having to see Julia.

"Morgan, she is overworked and hasn't been sleeping. I am sure Alonzo made her rest last night and today she will be back to her old self." Bess smiled, although even Morgan could see the worry in her eyes.

"So I should tell her?" Morgan pressed.

"Yes. Do you want me to come with you?"

"No. Yes. No. If I'm wrong I'd prefer that you were not there to see my failure pointed out." He said causing Bess to stand and kiss her husband.

"What was that for?" Morgan asked.

"I love you." Bess smiled as she ushered Morgan from their tent.

When Morgan reached the Med-tent he began to regret not accepting his wife's offer of coming along. Taking a deep breath he pulled back the flap.

"Um Julia, do you have a minute?" He asked nervously from the Med-tent entrance, not wanting to turn Julia into a hysterical wreck again. "I think I've found something."

"You have?" Julia asked spinning round quickly.

"Possibly. I was reviewing the medical files that were submitted before the launch and it seems that we were all seen by the same doctor at some stage, a doctor Bicknell."

"I'm not following."

"He gave everyone here at least one inoculation. Everyone that is except Devon."

"Why not Devon?"

"She was ill when it was her appointment with him so had it done be her normal physician. Anyway it got me thinking, what if Bicknell was the one who gave us the implants and what if Devon doesn't have one?"

"You're thinking that the implants are actually preventing us getting sick?" Julia hypothesised.

"Well no, I hadn't got that far." Morgan confessed. "I thought I'd leave that part to you."

"You may be on to something, if Devon really doesn't have an implant. But we need to know for sure. Can you get John to rig up a scanner so we don't have to remove her from the pod? I'll start looking at what the implant is doing. I'll need to run some tests on people with the implant. I'll also look at the one we removed. It could be possible that it is emitting some sort of field that is preventing something getting into our systems." She reeled off, leaving Morgan feeling confused.

"I'll go talk to Danziger then." He said pointing towards the entrance flap. When Julia waved him off as she dug through boxes he exited the tent muttering. "At least that was one up on crying."

"Danziger can I talk to you?" Morgan asked approaching the mechanic.

"What is it now Martin?"

"I need you to make me something."

"Morgan I am not your personal servant. If you need something make it yourself. Right now I am trying to organise our leaving." Danziger snapped.

"It's not for me, it's for Julia." Morgan said a little more unsure of himself, increasingly feeling intimidated by the mechanic. "It may help with finding a cu-" He was stopped from finishing by Danziger taking a firm hold of him and dragging him away from camp. "Oh god, you've gone nuts too. Let me go." He began to struggle, but ultimately he was no match for Danziger.

After what Morgan thought was miles Danziger stopped and turned to face Morgan, completely invading his personal space.

"What the hell do you think you are doing Martin?" Danziger growled.

"What?"

"Do you have any idea how hard people are finding it. No one wants to move on. Everyone is clinging to false hope. Uly is desperate to stay, since I told him we are moving he has not said a word to anyone. What do you think your latest foundation-less scheme is going to? The group can't take anymore false hope and disappointment."

"This isn't false hope. Julia thinks I could be onto something." Morgan protested.

"Julia has thought she has been onto something everyday since it has happened. Then she works without food and sleep until she proves herself wrong. She won't be able to take another failure either."

"Look, maybe you're right. Maybe this is another false lead. But what if it's not? What if this holds the key and you turn your back on it? How will Uly feel if years down the line he finds out we could have saved Devon? All I am asking is for you do some mechanics stuff and build me a little device so I can test this theory. If I am wrong we can stop Julia, if I am right maybe just maybe we can save Devon."

Danziger stared long and hard at Morgan until the smaller man had lost all his resolve. Finally, the mechanic asked.

"What do you need?"


	4. Chapter 4

"Ok Julia, Danziger is about to sc... what the hell are you taking? Are you ill?" Morgan asked as he burst into the Med-tent and saw Julia holding a hypo-spray to her neck.

"Morgan, it is just a stimulant." Julia replied wearily.

"Should you be taking it? I mean is it safe?"

"It is fine, I am keeping well within the recommended dose." The doctor replied, dismissing his concern.

"Ok, well Danziger said he would be ready to do the scan in an hour."

"Good." Julia replied distractedly as she looked through her microscope. "Morgan wait." She called as Morgan began to retreat.

"Yes." He said nervously.

"I need your blood."

"Yale." Danziger called when he saw the tutor cross the camp.

"Danziger. What can I do for you?"

"You have a minute?"

"Of course." Yale replied interested in what was on Danziger's mind."

"How's Uly?"

"He has eaten something but is still not talking. Alonzo is attempting to reach him on the dream plane." The tutor replied, his concern causing his normally deep voice to sound even deeper.

"I'm sorry." Danziger said.

"You are following Devon's wishes. If she woke up now she would give us an earful for wasting the last few days." Yale tried to comfort the mechanic, although he did not want to abandon Devon.

"That she would." Danziger agreed.

"Uly is strong, he will understand. It will just take time. But that is not what you want to talk about." Yale said.

"No. Look there may be nothing in this." Danziger said, scanning the area, ensuring no one was listening. "But, Morgan thinks he may have found something that could shed light on what's wrong with Devon."

"What does Julia say?" Yale asked, sitting down next to John as a wave of hope washed over him.

"She seems to be backing the idea, but I'm not sure how objective she's being at the moment."

"What is the idea?" Yale questioned.

"It has to do with the fact that Morgan is confident that Devon does not have an implant."

"No implant? How?...Why? Is he sure? How does he know?" Yale asked, shocked at the revelation.

"I'm not sure of all the details, but they've asked me to rig up a scanner to test the theory. It's pretty much done." He explained waving a small device in front of Yale. "But in case this is nothing I don't want to tell the others."

"Understandable. Why are you telling me?"

"Firstly, I'd like you to confirm the results I get from the scan. Secondly, if Morgan is onto something, to keep an eye on Julia."

"Julia?"

"Yeah, she's been working too hard to find a cure and I'm worried she's going to push herself too far and if it does come to nothing she'll start chasing leads that don't exist."

"Of course. But I am not sure how much use I'll be. Julia's knowledge is far more extensive than what I have access to. Plus she is able to see things that I would never be able to. I believe that we should have faith in her abilities."

"I have faith in her abilities. I'm just worried she's going to push herself too far." Danziger said. "May be I'm just being paranoid, but this group is feeling like it is falling apart and the only thing that is holding us together is something thinner than air in a vacuum. If Julia does burn out I think it will destroy the group."

"I will do whatever I can to prevent that eventuality." Yale assured the mechanic.

"Thank you. So you ready to check this out?" Danziger asked standing.

"As ready as I will ever be to have the last throw of the dice." The tutor agreed as he followed the mechanic to the old ship.

Once Danziger had climbed down the old ladder he looked around at the dead vessel before approaching the lonely, lifeless figure of Devon, suspended in a pod. Placing a hand on the mechanic's shoulder Yale said.

"She is too stubborn not to pull through." Danziger silently nodded his acknowledgement of the statement before taking a deep breath and holding the scanner in front of Devon.

"Son of a..." Danziger said, running the scanner of Devon's pod.

"What is it?" Yale enquired.

"Have a look at this." The mechanic said passing the scanner to Yale.

"There's nothing on it."

"Precisely. Morgan was right. Devon doesn't have an implant." Danziger said shaking his head.

"Are you sure this works?" The tutor questioned.

"Yep, look at this." Danziger said, running the scanner over himself. This time the screen flashed red.

"What now?" Yale questioned.

"Now we tell Julia." The mechanic said as he continued to look at the scanner in disbelief.


	5. Chapter 5

"Julia." Alonzo called entering the Med-tent. When he got no response he called again only louder. This time Julia whipped her head round.

"Hey." Alonzo grinned. "I brought in some lunch."

"Leave it there. I'll have it later." Julia said turning back to her microscope.

"No. You're eating now." Alonzo said putting the bowl down and approaching Julia.

"I'm in the middle of something." She responded irritably.

"I'll wait then." Alonzo said as he stood over her shoulder.

"I can't work with you hovering." Julia eventually snapped.

"Then I guess you'll have to eat." He smiled smugly.

"Not now Alonzo. Don't you understand I'm close. I can't stop now."

"Yes you can."

"No I can't. Now please leave." She said, stopping just short of shouting.

"What if you're not? What then? You can't keep doing this Julia. Have you even considered the possibility that there is no answer, that Elizabeth was right and this can't be solved by you or science?" Alonzo spat. With Julia looking down at her samples Alonzo did not see the soul destroying pain flash in the doctor's eyes. "You know what forget it." He added storming out of the Med-tent.

Julia sat back and tried to push his words from her mind. However, one of his statements kept looping in her head. Finally Julia could picture the answer and began working once more.

"Ok Julia what have you got?" Danziger asked as he and Yale entered the Med-tent a few hours later.

"Elizabeth was partly right."

"About what?"

"The planet rejecting us."

"Your big news is that the planet is rejecting us?" Danziger questioned.

"No. Bear with me a second. Elizabeth said everyone was dying as the planet was rejecting us. But what if it wasn't the planet rejecting us, but us rejecting the planet?" She said eyes sparkling with excitement.

"Still not seeing how that helps. I mean we are kind of stuck on the planet. No offence doc, but what has this got to do with the implant."

"Ok." Julia said as she started pacing. "This whole planet shows signs of being alive and being a living organism."

"Yeah." Danziger said encouraging her to continue.

"We are absorbing parts of the planet into our systems." Julia continued.

"So?"

"When someone has an organ transplant, the human body identifies the new organ as a foreign body and a threat. That causes the anti bodies to target the organ and without treatment destroy it." Julia said, getting frustrated that the others couldn't see the answer.

"Devon hasn't had a transplant." Danziger pointed out.

"In a way she has, we all have. Every breath we take we inhale and absorb alien air. Every item of food we eat causing us to ingest alien proteins. Since we got here our bodies have started to change, to show signs of the planet within us."

"You saying we are changing into diggers?"

"No. But Uly's transformation is an excellent example. The Terrians managed to speed up his transformation, but we are all going through the same thing, but slower. Are bodies are adapting to our new environment." Julia rambled on. Danziger and Yale shared a concerned glance and were about to stop her when she continued. "The problem is the process is still too quick. Our natural defences are identifying the new proteins as a threat. In Devon's case her immune system is actively attacking the proteins, but they are everywhere. That is why every organ was failing."

"So why aren't we all sick?"

"Because the implants are suppressing our auto-immune responses. They have to, else our bodies would have rejected them too."

"Hang on." A confused Danziger instructed. "You are saying that our absorption of the environment is triggering our immune system to attack our bodies, but the implants are suppressing our immune system so it doesn't attack our bodies, except for Devon who doesn't have an implant so her body is attacking her body?" Julia stood in silence trying to unravel Danziger's words. Finally she said.

"Yes."

"It seems a little far fetched." Danziger commented. "You buy into this?" He asked turning to Yale. With his back to Julia he did not notice the rejection and hurt on her face.

"It is definitely plausible. Have you managed to test your hypothesis?"

"Yes I have run several tests, introducing a simple virus to different blood samples. Devon's sample always reacts the quickest. And substantially quicker. Also having reviewed previous tests run on Devon since we got here she has always had an elevated antibody count. I just assumed it was natural." Julia said, trailing off, feeling responsible for the current state of her friend.

"A reasonable conclusion." Yale said placing a hand on Julia's shoulder.

"Say you are right, what do you intend doing? Give Devon the spare implant?" Danziger asked, beginning to sense a glimmer of hope.

"No. I have no idea how her body would react."

"Mimic the immune suppression element of it?" Yale suggested.

"No, I still don't have enough understanding of the implant." Julia replied, showing signs of dejection.

"But you do have a plan?" Danziger pressed.

"Yes, this." Julia said picking up a hypo-spray.

"And that is?"

"I have identified the specific antibodies causing the damage. This will turn them off."

"That simple?" Danziger asked suspiciously.

"It's not exactly simple, but as soon as we give this to Devon she should recover."

"Should? What happens if she doesn't."

"I could give her something to suppress her entire immune system, but obviously that could cause problems later on."

"Assuming that spray thing works, what about the damage already done to her system, can that be reversed?" Danziger questioned.

"That's the biggest unknown. At the time we placed her in the pod there was no sign of permanent damage. The danger will be that there is a delay in the antibodies being switched off. If that happens we run the risk of causing permanent damage." Julia said, reverting back to her cool, professional demeanour.

"But you are confident your solution will work?" Danziger asked for confirmation once more.

"Yes." Julia said, without a hint of doubt.

"Yale, you're the closest thing to an adult relative she has, what are your thoughts?"

"Uly needs his mother and the group needs Devon." Yale said calmly after a brief pause.

"How soon until you're ready to go?" Danziger asked Julia.

"I need a bit of time to set up a working area in the ship. But I can be ready in thirty minutes."

"Good. But Julia, Yale, I don't want this getting out. If it works we'll tell the group. Until then this is between us." The mechanic ordered leaving the tent.


	6. Chapter 6

"Ok, you sure you're ready?" Danziger asked Julia who stood along side Yale looking at Devon.

"I'm all set." Julia confirmed.

"Before we do this there is something that's bothering me."

"What?"

"If you are right about this, how come Sheppard and the other penal colonists weren't effected they have been here way longer than us?" Danziger probed.

"I'm not sure. It is more than likely that they also have implants, but I would need to have one here to run tests on to confirm that."

"You think the Council is tracking everyone on this planet?"

"Yes."

"That's a big assumption. What if you're wrong?"

"We know that the Terrians took them in, it is possible they helped change them like they did with Uly." Yale jumped in. "Which is why they had so much skill on the dream plane."

"What about Franklin and Bennett? They said they were here for eight years and they didn't have implants so why didn't they get sick?" Danziger pressed feeling the doubt swell inside him.

"They said they were in the system for eight years they weren't on the planet for all eight years. According to their records they performed lots of remote sensing from orbit. But you're right they had been on the planet for longer than us. However, they hadn't being travelling, they stayed in one place. Their lack of movement could mean they were exposed to a different combination of isotopes and elements, which delayed their reaction. Or it could be more of a genetic response. With organ rejection you can get hyper-acute, acute and chronic rejection, with each patient's response different. It could be that Devon is suffering from the equivalent of hyper-acute rejection, whereas Franklin and Bennett would have suffered from acute rejection had cold-sleep syndrome not got them first. Maybe it has to do with the time Devon spent in the tunnels with the Terrians after we got here. Elizabeth said the planet would reject us so they must have seen people die." Julia argued.

"Julia there seem to be several guesses there." Danziger pointed out rubbing his chin, the second thoughts now dominating.

"John there is so much to this planet that we will never understand." Yale said calmly. "But if we chose not to go on when we came up against unknowns we never would have left the escape pods. We need to have faith."

Danziger threw his head back before looking intently at Julia.

"You really think this will work?"

"Yes."

"Ok then. Let's do it." Danziger said as he punched at the controls freeing Devon from her frozen prison. As she was released from the pod gasping for breath, Danziger caught her small, weakened body and placed her on the examination table. As soon as she was down Julia administered, what she prayed was, the cure.

"Well?" Danziger questioned nervously as Julia ran some scans.

"It'll take a few moments." Julia replied scrutinising the readings from her dia-glove. When Devon started to groan Julia said.

"It's ok Devon."

"Julia?" Devon croaked causing Yale to hand Devon a beaker of water whilst Julia ran another set of scans.

"You're going to be ok Devon." Julia said as she continued to monitor Devon.

"What happened?" Devon asked as she tried to move.

"Devon I need you to remain still." Julia said as Devon continued to struggle. Suddenly Devon went limp.

"Doc? What happened?" Danziger asked fearing the worse.

"I sedated her."

"A little warning next time." Danziger growled. "Is something wrong?"

"No, but I needed to maintain a slow pulse. She was getting too agitated." Julia said calmly.

"So what now?"

"We wait."

"For how long?" Danziger demanded.

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know?" Danziger growled. "I thought you said this would work."

"It will. I just don't know how long it will take." Julia replied defensively.

"John we need to give it time." Yale intervened. "Leave Julia to concentrate on Devon."

"Fine." Danziger said throwing his hands up in frustration and stalking off to the adjacent area of the ship.

Every so often he would wonder back to where Julia was monitoring Devon, only for Yale to wave him away. So he paced and paced. But wearing a hole in the metal floor did not make him feel any better so he ripped out some of the ship's electronics and started to repair them. He became so transfixed trying to replace a leaking capacitor that he did not notice Yale approach from behind. When the tutor touched the mechanic's should John nearly dropped the electronics.

"She is stable." Yale smiled. "Julia is about to bring her round."

Hurriedly standing Danziger followed Yale toward Devon and Julia.

"You sure she's stable?"

"Yes." Julia said. "She'll be weak for awhile, but everything is beginning to function correctly."

"But she'll be ok?" Danziger asked, full of disbelief and relief.

"As long as she takes it easy she'll be fine." Julia said in tone that Yale thought was laced with terseness. As John sagged with relief Julia administered the hypo-spray causing Devon to come round.

"Devon it's Julia, it's going to be ok."

"Julia am I..."

"You're going to be fine. How are you feeling?" Julia began to reel off. Every question she asked was countered by a positive response from Devon. After what seemed, to Danziger, like an eternity Julia scanned her eyes over Devon, Danziger and Yale.

"Everything is working. She'll need rest, but she'll be fine." With that she backed off and allowed Danziger to talk to the recovering leader. However, before the mechanic could overcome the whirlwind of shock and relief Devon asked.

"John. Is Uly-"

"Uly's fine. Missing you, but other than that good." Danziger replied smiling. "He's outside with the others."

"How long have I been out?"

"Ten days."

"Ten days." Devon repeated quietly trying to absorb the information. When she looked round and realised where she was she asked. "Ten days?"

"Yep."

"Ten days the group hasn't moved?"

"Yep."

"Why didn't you go on? The colony ship... We can't afford to needlessly stop. We need to keep going. Why didn't you move?"

"For some reason Adair the group didn't want to leave you. You being unable to nag obviously made everyone nostalgic." Danziger retorted. Neither Danziger or Devon noticed the guilt sweeping over Julia's face and her silently leaving the craft.

"Please tell me you have at least scouted the area for routes."

"Of course. Alonzo has found a good route. As soon as Julia says you can move we can go."

"I can move. I'll sit in the Transrover." Devon said defiantly.

"You are unbelievable Adair."

Outside the craft Yale found Julia leaning against a rock.

"Julia." The tutor called.

"Has something happened?" Julia asked.

"No, Devon is busy trying to organise Danziger. I was just checking on you."

"Me? Why me?"

"You look tired."

"Guess I haven't had much sleep recently."

"Why don't you get some rest."

"I need to keep an eye on Devon." Julia began to argue.

"Julia you yourself said everything was looking good. I will keep a vigil, if there are any changes I will call you immediately. You'll be no good to Devon if you collapse. Come, I'll walk you back to camp, I am collecting Uly anyway." Reluctantly Julia allowed Yale to guide her away from the ship.

"Is there something else on your mind?" Yale probed.

"No."

"Are you sure? You seem distracted."

"Just tired I guess." Julia said.

"Would you like to tell the group the good news?"

"No, I think I'll just try to sleep." Julia replied.

"Well get some rest. I'll see you in the morning. Good night Julia." Yale said as Julia disappeared into the fading light.

As she entered the empty, Alonzo-less Med-tent she collapsed on a cold cot and cursed her failures in not diagnosing Devon earlier. The silent turmoil inside the Med-tent was in stark contrast to the cries of relief and celebration outside when Yale delivered the news.


	7. Chapter 7

"Hey Lonz." Danziger said as he walked over to the pilot.

"Danziger." Alonzo nodded.

"You ok? You looked a bit spaced out."

"Just worried about Julia."

"Why? She ill?" Danziger asked concerned.

"She's ju...I don't know, she's really withdrawn."

"She's been pushing herself hard, she probably just needs rest." Danziger said.

"I hope so." Alonzo replied.

"Would you prefer to sit the scout out?" Danziger asked.

"No. We kinda had a fight and I think she might need space." Alonzo said, the spark from his eyes gone. Danziger opened his mouth to say something but Alonzo cut him off. "Besides I think she'll get more rest without me around." Alonzo grinned, although the smile did not make it to his eyes. "But Danz keep an eye on her and make sure she doesn't work."

"No problem." The mechanic assured the pilot. "Don't forget to keep your gear on and check in regularly." He added causing Alonzo to smirk.

"What?" Danziger asked.

"Nothing. Well it's just that you are nagging like Devon." The pilot grinned.

"You know you are damn lucky you are on a five day scout." Danziger said in a low, gruff voice.

"Why's that?"

"Cos in five days I may have got over the need to send you on a long scout with Martin."

"See you in five days." Alonzo grinned as he climbed into the ATV and disappeared into the distance.

Shaking his head he walked over to the Dune rail where Baines and Walman were busy strapping on equipment.

"You two ready?"

"Yep, just loading this on then we're good to go." Walman said. "We have the list from Julia and know what we're looking for."

"Good. Don't forget to check in regularly." Danziger ordered, drawing smirks from both men. The smiles were quickly washed from their faces by Danziger's scowl. Shaking his head he walked towards Devon's tent to ensure she was still fine and healthy.

"Danziger." Devon greeted as John ducked into her tent. "I wanted to-"

"Before you ask, the long range scout and the short range food scout have both set off. Most tents are down and loaded onto the Transrover. As soon as you are ready I will help you to the 'rover, with Uly."

"That's good, but I was actually going to say thank you for looking after Uly and the group. I know it can't have been easy. So thank you." Devon said. After a brief moment of stunned silence John said.

"You're welcome, although I'm not too sure what good I did."

"Don't be so hard on yourself. The group is still together."

"Yeah well...as soon as Julia has-"

"Devon." Julia said interrupting the conversation. "You ready for me to run some scans?"

"Of course." Devon said encouraging the doctor to approach. As Julia started to run the scans Danziger asked.

"You sure she is ready to travel?"

"Of course I'm ready." Devon replied.

"As long as she sits in the Transrover and doesn't push herself, there is no reason not to travel." Julia said as she drew a sample of blood from Devon.

"Told you." Devon threw at Danziger as Julia kept working. Finally Julia stood up and left the pair, who were bickering about routes, alone.

An hour later the group resumed they trek towards New Pacifica with hope and enthusiasm once again flowing through the colonists. Despite the physical strain on their bodies after days of inactivity the group moved quickly, happy to be on the move once more. Not even Morgan complained. The only member not to join in with the upbeat banter was Julia, who trailed at the back, devoid of energy and confidence.

When the group finally stopped for lunch as Julia sat off to the side by herself, under the shelter of a tree, everyone else swarmed round Devon, an unspoken need to see their recovered friend and leader.

"Something wrong?" Danziger asked noticing Yale's distant look.

"I am concerned about Julia." Yale explained nodding his head towards Julia who sat under a tree, eyes shut. "Since setting off she has not said a word to anyone."

"Alonzo said she'd been withdrawn, but he also mentioned they had a fight." Danziger said.

"Ahh." The tutor murmured.

"If it makes you feel better I'll talk to her later. In the mean time we should get going." Danziger pressed, keen to get going and not wanting to interfere in anyone's private lives. However, he too shared Yale's concerns and once the group had set off again he decided to bite the bullet and talk to the doctor.

"Julia." Danziger said dropping to the back of the group. "Something on your mind?"

"No."

"Uh huh. See I couldn't help noticing you are keeping your distance from everyone." Danziger probed.

"No I'm not. I thought you were riding in the Transrover." She commented changing subjects.

"I was. But Adair's nagging was getting too much. Besides Magnus has hurt her ankle so it made sense for her to ride with Devon."

"She has? When? I-"

"Relax doc it is nothing serious. She went over on it during the break. Yale and Bess strapped it."

"But-" Julia started, concerned that she had missed an injury.

"Doc, she is fine. Hardly any swelling, Yale said it will be as good as new in no time."

"I should-" She started again only for Danziger to cut her off once more.

"No offence doc, but you need to relax. There was no point in disturbing you. Most of the people in the group can handle a simple sprain there is no need to come running to you every time." He tried to explain, but his words made Julia feel useless. When Julia remained silent he said some what awkwardly. "Look I don't know exactly what happened between you two, but Lonz will be back with us in no time and there is always the gear." When he got no verbal response he added. "It'll be fine." As the feeling of awkwardness grew Danziger almost sighed with relief when True bellowed for him. "If you'll excuse me, the boss is calling." He said speeding up and heading towards True.

When they reached the camp in the evening Julia set up the Med-tent and started to run tests on plants she had collected on route. When her back stiffened up she decided it was time to get something to eat. Pushing away from her workbench a wave of dizziness hit her again causing her to sit still and breath deeply. When she was sure it had passed she gingerly stood and left the tent. To her surprise the camp was almost deserted and it was much darker than she had expected.

"We were about to send a search party for you." Bess smiled warmly when she saw Julia.

"Guess I got caught up in my work." Julia said quietly.

"Remember you need to rest too." Bess reminded her gently. "How're you doing?"

"Ok." Julia replied. The doctor did not want to talk, she was happy being left to her own thoughts, but she could feel Bess staring at her. Knowing the only way she was going to be left alone was to talk to Bess she said. "Bess, the other night...what happened...thank you for what-"

"Julia." Bess cut her off sensing her friend's awkwardness. "There is no need to thank me. You're my friend and I am happy to help. Next time don't bottle things up though. Use your friends." Julia nodded and Bess thought she was about to say something when Morgan started calling from the Martin's tent. "I'd better go before he wakes the whole camp. I made sure they saved some food for you." Bess smiled.

"Thanks Bess." Julia replied as she watched her friend disappear. The doctor was just reaching the food when Danziger groaned and then started swearing.

"John what's wrong?" Julia asked walking over to him.

"Nothing." He said tucking his hand under his opposite arm.

"Doesn't sound like nothing." Julia said.

"Julia it's fine." Danziger replied roughly.

"You're in pain." She countered.

"It is fine. I don't need you fussing over me." He said abrasively as he tried to ignore the throbbing in his hand.

"At leas-"

"I said I'm fine. I really don't need a doctor."

Taking his attitude as confirmation of a loss of faith in her skills she quickly returned to the Med-tent all thoughts of food forgotten. When she entered the Med-tent she looked briefly at the samples on the workbench before moving to the cot. Lying down she curled herself into the foetal position and lay looking at a patch on the side of the Med-tent wondering when she had become to useless.

Julia lay awake, unable to push aside her feelings of failure. At times she considered taking a seriderm, but concern that something might go wrong with Devon stopped her taking it. Instead she remained awake all night thinking about recent events. When dawn finally came she was relieved that she had a fourteen mile hike to concentrate on. Slowly getting up she packed away her equipment. She was about to take down the tent when another wave of dizziness and nausea hit her. Sitting down she took some calming breaths and waited for the symptoms to subside, only this time they lingered.

"Julia." Danziger called from just outside the Med-tent. "You up?"

"John." She responded resulting in the mechanic entering the tent.

"Morning. You ok?" He asked. Part of Julia wanted to say no, it wanted her to rest, but part of her persuaded her that she was now a burden to the group. Because of her failings the group had been held up for too long so instead she answered.

"Yeah I'm fine."

"Good, Cameron and I will take the tent down while you get some breakfast." He said. "By the way you missed Alonzo checking in. He's fine." The mechanic said before ordering. "Go eat."

Carefully Julia stood and picked up her Dia-glove. "Ok, but I just want to check on Devon." She said as she slowly walked towards Danziger at the tent's entrance. As she reached Danziger she saw his hand had a bandage wrapped round it.

"Your hand, let me look at it."

"Julia, the hand's fine." Danziger said curtly. "Now get out of here so I can pack up." He added. He never saw the hurt or helplessness that flashed in Julia's eyes as she bowed her head and left the Med-tent.

When she reached Devon's tent the group's leader was busy packing up.

"Devon."

"Morning Julia, what can I do for you?"

"I want to run a couple of tests."

"There's no need. I'm fine, perhaps a little weak still, but other than that I'm good." Devon dismissed her.

"At least let me confirm that." Julia asked, once again feeling like an outcast.

"Fine." Devon said throwing her hands up allowing Julia to run the scans. "Well?"

"Everything is looking ok." Julia confirmed looking down at her glove.

"Told you." Devon replied. "Look Julia I-" She started only for Uly to burst into the tent.

"Mom, I've had my breakfast. I'm ready to help." He exclaimed before noticing that Julia was also in the tent. "Julia. Is mom ok?"

"She's fine." Julia said leaving the tent.

When the group was all packed up they started their long hike towards New Pacifica. Once again Devon rode in the Transrover with Uly and Magnus. Cameron and Mazatl had taken the Dune rail to look for supplies leaving everyone else on foot. As with the previous day Julia fell to the back of the group, trailing behind lost in her own thoughts. As the hike continued each step became more difficult and the world seemed to spin faster and faster. As she struggled forward she lost more and more ground on the rest of the group, who seemed to not notice or not care. They were mere spots in the distance when the dizziness became too much and she fell to the ground.


	8. Chapter 8

"What's wrong True girl?" Danziger asked, noticing his daughter was displaying less enthusiasm than normal. "You want to sit on the back of the 'rover?"

"No. I'm bored not tired." She replied.

"My company not good enough for you?" He said feigning hurt.

"Don't be silly." She replied.

"Are you actually telling me you are missing Uly's company?" He smirked.

"Of course not." She said dismissively. "It's just that..." True faded off.

"You've got no one to boss around? How about I put you on the back of the 'rover and you can play in VR?"

"But you said I wasn't allowed to."

"I changed my mind. You can play for one hour."

"Really? Thanks dad." True smiled. Bending down Danziger picked True up and waited for the Transrover to pass them before putting True on the back. When he noticed True was not putting her headset on he asked.

"You change your mind?"

"No."

"So what's the problem?"

"Where's Julia?"

"She's..." Danziger started as he scanned the local area. When he couldn't see her he came to a stop as the Transrover continued moving forward with the rest of the group. Pulling on his gear he tried and failed to reached Julia. Hurrying back to the front of the group he once again scanned for Julia, again not finding her.

"John? Something wrong?" Bess asked noticing the mechanic's odd behaviour.

"Have you seen Julia?"

"She was at the back of the group." Bess replied.

Reaching for his gear Danziger ordered Magnus to stop the Transrover. When it had come to a halt he opened the door and grabbed the Jumpers, ignoring Devon's questions. He then clambered onto the roof and using the Jumpers looked back along the path they had just traversed.

"John Danziger. Will you stop this minute and tell me what you're doing?" Devon demanded as he unceremoniously dismounted.

"Julia's missing."

"Missing? What do you mean missing?" Devon asked.

"I mean she is not here."

"How can she not be here? Have you tried her on gear?"

"Of course I've tried her on gear." Danziger snapped in reply. "I'm going to retrace our steps. Walman you're with me."

"I'll keep trying her on gear." Devon called after him as worried whispers spread round the group.

Danziger and Walman jogged back along the route they had taken looking for any sign of Julia. They had covered a mile when they were beginning to loose hope. Pausing Danziger lifted the Jumpers to his eyes and saw a mound on the ground in the distance. Concentrating more on the image he saw the mound had blond hair, which was blowing in the breeze. "Over there." He exclaimed before setting off at a sprint, Walman hurrying after him.

When the men skidded to a stop in front of Julia, Danziger immediately dropped to his knees and felt for a pulse. When he finally felt it, he was at first relieved that there was one, but then concerned that it was racing.

"We need Yale on gear." He said to Walman, who took the hint and started contacting the main group, as Danziger rolled Julia over trying to wake her. When he could see her face he saw a nasty looking gash on her forehead that was caked in dried blood. "Come on Julia, wake up." He pleaded, still getting no response from the doctor.

"You want to try splashing her with water?" Walman asked, before diverting his attention back to his gear.

Half ignoring the suggestion Danziger kept gently shaking Julia, calling to her. Finally she began to stir, groaning as she came to.

"John?" She asked as she pried her eyes open. "What...what happened?" She asked trying to sit up.

"Whoa, take it easy doc. You've taken a nasty blow to the head." He said holding Julia down.

"I have? How?" Julia asked, disorientated.

"Not sure." Danziger replied as Julia once again tried to sit up. This time she was successful, but the fast movement caused another wave of nausea to hit her. This time there was no suppressing the wave and she quickly moved to her knees before she began dry heaving. Pulling a face Danziger sympathetically patted her back. When he was confident that Julia's stomach had settled he gently pulled the bag off her back and threaded his arms through the straps.

"Feeling better?" He asked.

"Hmm, we should move, slowed down the group already." Julia mumbled trying to scramble to her feet.

"Julia slow down." Danziger said, worried about how heavy a blow she had received. "The group's not going anywhere. They're setting up camp."

"But we need to go on." Julia said beginning to look distressed.

"And we will. But first we need to get you checked out."

"I'm fine." Julia said waving her arm dismissively.

"Uh huh. Well when we get back to camp you can argue your case." He threw back as Walman nodded his head to suggest that he should approach the other man.

"Yale wants to speak to you." Walman explained.

"Keep an eye on her. Try to dress the head wound." Danziger ordered as he placed his gear on. "Danziger here."

"John is she ok?" Devon immediately asked.

"She's conscious, but she has a nasty gash and is kind of out of it and nauseous and dizzy."

"You should try to keep her awake." Yale said. "It is possible she has a concussion."

"Did she say what happened?" Devon jumped in.

"No, I'm not sure she knows, as I said she is not very with it." Danziger said glancing back at Julia who Walman was trying to stop clambering to her feet.

"Do you want me to come and meet you?" Yale asked.

"Nah, I think we can make it to you. Anything I should be looking out for?"

"Just keep her awake, if her behaviour changes contact me immediately."

"Will do. And Adair relax, the last thing we need is you having a relapse." Danziger signed off before approaching Julia and Walman asking.

"Can you walk?"

"Yes." Julia said.

"Ok then, Walman take her other side." John ordered as he bent down and hooked Julia's arm over his shoulders, with Walman mirroring the action on Julia's other side. Both men ignored the doctors protests.

"My bag." She said, realising it was no longer on her back.

"I've got it." Danziger assured her. "Ok, you ready doc?" When Julia half heartedly nodded the three set off back towards the main group.

As soon as they arrived at the newly set up camp they helped Julia into the Med-tent where Yale was waiting.

"Ok, let's have a look." He said kindly as Julia was placed on a cot.

"I'm fine." Julia tried to wave him off.

"How about you let me be the judge of that? If you have a concussion you shouldn't be treating yourself." As Julia relaxed he asked. "What happened?"

"Not sure. Danziger said I tripped."

"You don't remember?" Yale asked, his concern growing.

"No."

"Let's look at your wound then." Yale said as he removed the bandages that Walman had applied.

"Well?" Devon asked as Yale emerged from the Med-tent.

"The head wound is not very deep." Yale started as he joined Devon, Danziger and the Martins.

"You sure? There was a lot of blood." Danziger pointed out.

"Gashes to the eyebrows always bleed heavily."

"What aren't you telling us?" Devon asked.

"There is no evidence that she has a concussion."

"But she was really out of it." John argued.

"That may be, but there is no sign of a concussion. Also her pulse rate is far higher than it should be."

"Couldn't that just be from the walk?" Devon asked hopefully.

"It was fast when we found her." Danziger replied.

"You think she's sick?" Devon asked.

"I don't know. She does not have a fever." Yale replied.

"Could her implant be failing?" Bess asked, her face full of fear.

"Let's not overreact folks." Danziger said calmly. "Concussion or not, a blow to the head can make people a bit spaced out."

"While that is true, it does not explain her fast pulse." Yale said.

"Could stimulants?" Morgan asked.

"It is possible. Do you believe she was taken stimulants?"

"Well, the other day, after the implant thing I went to tell Julia you were going to do the scan and she was you know?" He said holding his fingers to his neck mimicking injecting something. "She said it was a stimulant."

"You didn't think of mentioning this before?" Danziger asked.

"Why would I?" Morgan replied defensively. "She said she wasn't taking too many. She's the doctor, she'd know."

"Well how long has she been taking them?" Devon demanded.

"Don't look at me Adair, this is news to me." Danziger said holding his arms up.

"I guess since we got sick." Morgan said.

"I can't believe you didn't mention something." Danziger muttered, his mood not getting any better.

"I didn't think it was important. Compared to the whole breakdown thing it seemed normal."

"What breakdown thing?" Danziger and Devon asked in unison.

"Well umm..." Morgan started only for Bess to intervene.

"It wasn't a breakdown. After you told her we were moving on it all got a bit much for her." The younger Martin tried to explain diplomatically.

"Why didn't you say something?" Devon asked.

"She's a private person and wouldn't want everyone knowing. She just needed to rest and Alonzo was there for her." Bess replied.

"This is getting us nowhere." Danziger said. "Let's just talk to Julia."

"I am afraid you can't. I sedated her." Yale explained.

"Ok, well I say we let her sleep and we'll ask her in the morning." Danziger decided, breaking up the meeting and leaving the assembled group. When Yale and Devon were the only ones left, Yale turned to Devon and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Julia will be fine."

"I hope you're right, but what if you're not?"

"John is right there is no point needlessly worrying and jumping to unfounded conclusions. All we know is Julia took a blow to her head. Everything else could just be down to exhaustion."

"What about the stimulants and the breakdown?"

"Alonzo would have said something if it was a serious concern." Yale countered. "As for the stims

Julia has showed no signs of overdose, we have to trust her. What I do know is if you make yourself ill worrying, it will only hinder Julia."

"Thanks Yale." Devon half smiled as she retreated to her tent.


	9. Chapter 9

As Julia stirred she noticed her head felt foggy and her eyes were heavily. Prying them open caused her head to throb. Lifting a hand to her head she felt the bandage above her eye and the memories of the previous day came flooding back. Before she could dwell on it though a familiar voice said.

"Julia, how are you feeling?"

"Yale? How long was I out for?" Julia asked trying to sit up.

"Over twelve hours. It appears you needed the rest."

"Twelve hours?" Julia questioned in disbelief, attempting to scramble out of the cot. "Is Devon still ok?"

"Apart from her concern for you, Devon is fine." Yale assured her.

"Concern?"

"Julia you took a blow to the head and were not your normal self afterwards." Yale explained. "Why wouldn't we be concerned?" He asked, only to be met by silence. Julia's mind apparently elsewhere.

"Julia." Yale said louder, causing her head to turn. "How is your head?"

"Fine. I'm fine. I should check on Devon though."

"Julia you should rest." Yale gently chastised.

"I'm fine." Julia repeated getting up.

"Julia, please sit down a minute we need to talk about something." Yale said, causing worry to run across Julia's features.

"What's wrong? Is Alonz-"

"Alonzo is fine." He assured her before asking. "Do you remember the tests I ran when you got back to camp?"

"Yes."

"And that your pulse rate was elevated."

"Kind of."

"Even when you were asleep it was racing." He continued, causing Julia to check her pulse. "Can you think of any reason why it might be so high? Have you taken anything that may have caused it?" He subtly probed.

"No, I don't think so. I took a couple of stims but that was before we woke Devon." She answered distractedly, going through different causes in her head. "They should be out of my system now."

"Are you sure that you did not make a mistake or forgot that you took some?" Yale carefully continued.

"Of course I'm sure." Julia replied defensively. "I am not addicted to them if that is what you are getting at."

"I never said that you were."

"You are thinking it. If you don't believe you can check my logs." She said tersely.

"I believe you Julia." Yale said, worried by her sudden defensiveness. "I just hoped there was a simple explanation for your fast pulse. I'll leave you to get ready." He finished warmly before leaving Julia to her own thoughts, deciding not to risk alienating the doctor. As soon as he was out of the Med tent Devon beckoned him over.

"How is she?"

"Physically she seems ok."

"But?"

"There is something not right, I just can't identify it."

"Did you ask about her pulse and the stims?"

"Yes. But I am afraid I only managed to upset her. She admitted to taking some but said she hadn't had any since you woke up."

"So what caused her fast pulse?" Devon asked, fearing the answer.

"I don't know. Unfortunately, Julia is now under the impression that I think she has an addiction to stims. I thought it was best to give her some space before questioning her further."

Before Devon could respond they noticed a dust cloud quickly approaching the camp. A short while later the ATV had barely come to a stop when Alonzo jumped out.

"Where is she? How is she?" He demanded.

"Damn it Alonzo." Danziger growled. "The ATV is not your personal plaything. You need to look after it, take it easy. Not run it into the ground." He ranted as he turned to look at the ATV and point out all the damage.

"She's in the Med-tent and she seems fine." Devon said ignoring Danziger's rant. When the mechanic finally turned away from the ATV to look at Alonzo the pilot had already disappeared.

"Julia." Alonzo called bursting into the tent.

"Alonzo, I thought you were on a scout?" She said confused.

"I was. I came back when I heard what had happened." He said approaching her.

"Why? I've wasted too much time already. You shouldn't have abandoned your scout."

"I came back because you were hurt and I was worried." Alonzo replied placing his hands on her shoulders.

"But we are loosing time."

"Julia if it meant that you were safe and ok we could waste a year." Alonzo said before asking. "What are you doing?"

"Just running a couple of tests on these plants then I'll check on Devon."

"Julia you were knocked out yesterday, you should be resting not running more tests."

"I'm fine. If you don't believe me ask Yale, he'll confirm I don't have a concussion."

"It is not a concussion I'm worried about. You need to rest."

"Don't you think I am the best judge of that?"

"On current evidence, no." He said, louder than he had intended. Once again the hurt in Julia's eyes was not visible to the pilot. When Julia did not stop what she was doing he muttered. "Unbelievable." Before leaving the tent.

"Devon, can I speak to you a minute?" Alonzo asked having calmed down.

"Of course. How's Julia?"

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about." He said, the concern etched into his face.

Half an hour later Julia left the confines of the Med tent in order to seek out Devon and run tests. As soon as the group's leader saw the doctor she question.

"Julia, how's your head?"

"It's fine." Julia replied as she began scanning Devon.

"Julia I am fine, all of your tests agree. Don't they?"

"Yes, bu-"

"No buts you should be resting not worrying about me."

"I'm fine."

"Really? So you'd be up for a scout?" Devon probed.

"A scout? Devon I can't leave y-"

"Julia, every test you have run has shown I'm fine. You are too important to the group to spend all of your time fussing over me. If you really are ok I want you on that scout. If you are not ok you need to go get some rest. Your choice."


	10. Chapter 10

"Hey you're awake." Alonzo grinned when he saw Julia stirring beside him in the Dune Rail.

"How long have I been asleep?" Julia asked trying to straighten in her seat.

"About two hours."

"Why didn't you wake me?"

"You needed the sleep. I have spoken to Devon, everything is fine, she is fine, no need to worry. So you ok?"

"Fine." Julia replied looking out of the Dune Rail at the passing scenery. Not impressed by her answer Alonzo stopped the rail.

"Why have we stopped?" Julia asked, still feeling foggy.

"You need to talk to me. It is just the two of us and we aren't going anywhere until you tell me what's wrong." Alonzo said.

"Don't be ridiculous, we are on a scout, we need to find the new route." Julia dismissed him.

"No we don't, the next few days' routes have already been planned." Alonzo said.

"Then why I'm I out here? I have better things to do."

"You're here because everyone is worried about you. They wanted to give you a break."

"By they you mean you and Devon?" Julia questioned shaking her head.

"Well...yeah. But only because we care. Julia it is obvious something is wrong why won't you talk to me?"

"I'm fine."

"Don't lie, not to me. I mean it we are not going anywhere until you let me in." He said causing Julia to climb out of the rail. "Julia." Alonzo called clambering out of the rail. "You can't walk back to the others it's too far." Before the pilot had caught up with Julia it looked like the young doctor was staggering before she finally came to a stop and leaned against a tree. Rushing to her side Alonzo asked.

"What's wrong?"

"Just a bit dizzy."

"Why?"

"Don't know." Julia said her eyes scrunched shut.

"Is it stims?" Alonzo finally blurted out.

"You too?" Julia asked opening her eyes allowing Alonzo to see the hurt and resignation pouring from them.

"The others said your pulse was racing and he suggested it could be stims." Alonzo confessed.

"I'm not taking stims. I took a few when I was trying to figure out what was wrong with Devon, but only a few."

Alonzo opened his mouth to speak but there was enough hesitation before the words came for Julia to speak first.

"Why won't anyone believe me?" She partially cried out before sliding down the tree trunk. When she was sitting on the ground she pulled her knees to her chest. "I guess I know. It is not like I have the best track record after I experimented on Uly and injected myself with the strand of Terrian DNA."

"Julia no one is holding that against you." Alonzo said dropping down beside her.

"No? Then why does everyone assume I am addicted to stims?"

"Because there is obviously something wrong and you won't tell us what."

"I'm fine."

"You can say it as much as you like but it won't make it true. Look at yourself Julia, you look terrible, you are being more elusive than normal, more bad tempered, you have shut me out."

"If I am that bad why force me onto a scout with you?"

"Because I want to help. I love you Julia and I am not giving up."

"What do you want me to say?"

"Tell me what's wrong with you? If you say it is not stims I believe you, but if isn't stims what is it?"

"I don't know, it could just be down to the fact I haven't got much sleep recently."

"Why?"

"What do you mean why?"

"Why haven't you got much sleep?"

"There has been too much to do. Healing us, healing Devon, finding edible food, monitoring us, monitoring Devon-" She began to reel off.

"Why are you pushing yourself so hard?" Alonzo asked.

"I have to."

"Why?"

"I missed that Devon was sick from something different to the rest of us. I should have spotted it. Then it took me ten days to diagnose her. It was so simple and I didn't see it. My failure caused us to loose ten days travelling. Then because of yesterday I made us loose another half day. I am a hindrance to the group. What's the point of me being there if I can't be a doctor?"

"Why wouldn't you be a doctor anymore? Julia, you cured Devon. She is with us again because of you." Alonzo asked, struggling to follow Julia's words.

"No one trusts me."

"Who?"

"Devon, Danziger, everyone."

"What are you talking about?"

"Devon won't let me run the tests I need to run to check she is ok."

"When has Devon ever patiently let you run tests?"

"John, he cut his hand and won't let me look at it. It obviously needs attention but he won't let me anywhere near him." Julia continued ignoring Alonzo's objection.

"That may be my fault. I asked him to make sure you were resting." Alonzo confessed.

"And now the group thinks I am addicted to stims. Would you let an addict treat you?"

"But you said yourself you are not addicted."

"What does that matter. They have made up their minds already. I'm no longer trusted to be a doctor."

"That is not true. The only reason people don't want you to treat them right now is because they are concerned about you and want to give you a break. Once you are rested it will all go back to how it was before."

"What if it doesn't?"

"You're worried that if you are not a doctor the group would what? Abandon you? That's nuts Julia, we are more than a group we are a family."

"I've already betrayed everyone here. I nearly operated and possibly killed Uly because a hologram told me to. I spied on and betrayed the group to a glorified computer."

"Everyone forgave you." Alonzo argued. "Besides you chose to turn your back on the council. You chose us like we chose you." He added gripping Julia's hand.

"How can they have? Deep down they are right to be weary. I betrayed them." She said, her voice barely above a whisper.

"You don't have to prove yourself Julia. You've done enough."

"No I haven't. Eben is dead because I failed. Devon could have been lost forever."

"You saved Devon." Alonzo reiterated. "Why are you being so hard on yourself?"

"The only thing I have is being a doctor. I was created for that purpose. To fail like I have is....it feels like something has been ripped from me. All my life I could trust me, trust my skills. But now I have nothing."

"That's not true. You have me and I trust you with my life." Alonzo said, causing Julia's face to flash with an empty smile.

"Since I got here, to this planet, perhaps even since I was born you were the only one to believe in me as a person." Julia started. "I grew dependent on that faith, when it was taken away I felt so lost and empty."

"I never took it away." Alonzo said confused.

"Yes you did. Devon, Danziger, the others not trusting me I can cope with, but you I just..."

"Julia, I have always and will always believe in you." Alonzo said.

"You said there was no cure for Devon, that science didn't have the answer. That I couldn't help her."

"Julia I said that because I was worried and angry. I didn't want you to forget yourself, to cure Devon at the expense of you." Alonzo tried to explain, holding Julia's face in his hands, forcing her to look in her eyes. "I have never lost faith in you. Even when you were putting me and my leg through hell I trusted you. Whatever happens I trust you you. Julia I love you. For all I care you could give up being a doctor and I would still love you." With those words he pulled Julia into his chest and held her in a tight embrace.


	11. Chapter 11

As the midday sun hung high in the sky Alonzo stretched out his legs causing Julia to stir in his arms.

"Hey." He smiled looking down at her. "How are you feeling and don't say fine?"

Julia remained silent for awhile considering her response, finally she said. "I don't know."

Tightening his grip on the doctor Alonzo hoped that his presence would, for now, be enough. Eventually Julia asked.

"Shouldn't we get going?"

"We probably should." The pilot said disentangling himself from Julia and climbing to his feet. Offering his hand he helped Julia up and was immediately concerned that she wavered.

"What's wrong?"

"I think I just need to eat." Julia said calmly. "I guess it has been a while since I ate properly."

"I packed plenty of food in the rail." Alonzo said as he kept hold of Julia and guided her back to their transport. Silently he watched her like a hawk.

When they reached the rail he made sure Julia was sitting safely before raiding the food supplies. He then watched as she ate the rations, debating with himself whether he should probe further how long it had been since she ate. But as she seemed more relaxed than she had been for days, possibly weeks, he decided not to endanger her mood and allowed her to eat in silence. As soon as he was content that Julia had eaten enough he climbed into the driving seat and powered away.

"We are going the wrong way." Julia commented after an hour. "The others will never be able to cover enough ground to intercept us."

"We're not heading back to the others." Alonzo said grinning.

"Why not? I need to-"

"Rest." Alonzo finished for her.

"No, I-" Julia started again only for Alonzo into interrupt once more.

"You need to rest. Until you are, you and me are going to sight see."

"Sight see?" Julia asked suspiciously. "And who decides I am rested?"

"That would be me. And for the record scowling is not going to earn you any points."

"Points? So there is some objective system for a completely subjective metric?"

"Your beautiful when you're cranky." Alonzo grinned causing Julia to shake her head.

"Where exactly are we going?"

"Somewhere special, I discovered it when I was on the long-range scout." Alonzo grinned.

"Special?"

"Yeah, it's....special. But before we arrive I need you to trust me. You are not allowed to run any scans or any tests you just have to go with the moment."

"What are you talking about? What's wrong with running tests?"

"After the crash I hated this planet. I desperately wanted to be out in space again. Free from surface, free from the Terrians. But in time, I came to understand how much this planet offers. Every day we see things that don't make sense. Your problem is you don't embrace it, you are scared by it. You need to see it for what it is and to be excited by it, not worry about why or how."

"Not all of us have the flyboy genes."

"True, but fortunately you will have a good teacher." Alonzo grinned as the rail continued on.

"Any news?" Danziger questioned the following evening as he walked over to Devon, who sat by the fire holding a mug.

"Alonzo checked in, said they were fine." Devon replied somewhat distantly.

"But?"

"I just feel like we have missed something."

"With Julia?" The mechanic questioned, causing Devon to nod.

"The way I see it there are four possibilities. One there is nothing wrong with Julia and she is going to be crankier than normal for awhile as we questioned her. Two, she was exhausted and just needed a break. Three, there was something wrong, which Alonzo is sorting. Four she is sick, in which case she'll sort it. If it was four Lonz would not be saying that everything was fine so we can rule out that option."

"I think we can rule out one." Devon said.

"Agreed, which leaves us with two or three. Either way there is nothing we can do."

"What do you mean there is nothing we can do? If it is two we need to be more careful in the future. If it is three we need to find out what is wrong."

"No we don't."

"What do you mean we don't? Of course we do."

"What I mean is, it's Julia's business. If she wants us to know she'll tell us, but my guess is she won't."

"That's it?"

"You want to interrogate her?" The mechanic suggested.

"Of course not." Devon said. "But if something is wrong we-"

"Need to let Julia sort it out herself." Danziger finished for her.

"What if she can't?"

"She has Alonzo and failing that we have to trust she'll ask for help."

"When has Julia ever asked for help?"

"Never, because she is stubborn and independent. Kinda like you."

"I'm not-"

"Don't even go their Adair. You knew full well you were sick from something different to the rest of us, but did you ask for help or even tell us?"

"I...I was..." Devon tried, but was unable to say anything.

"You were scared, you didn't want to admit to being weakened and you didn't want to be a burden." Danziger said for her. "Like I said stubborn and independent."

"But I needed help, so does Julia." Devon argued.

"Which Alonzo is providing. If he needs help he'll ask." Danziger said before growling and standing. "Martin." He bellowed. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Me? What do you mean?" Morgan replied nervously.

"You have been pacing for the last five minutes. It is annoying."

"I'm sorry if my anxiety is annoying you." Morgan threw back.

"Why are you anxious?" Devon questioned as Danziger pleaded with her not to ask.

Waving his arms away from camp Morgan said. "Julia."

"Well Morgan, your concern is very touching but Alonzo says she is fine." Devon said calmly.

"Then why aren't they back yet? It is dark out there."

"It's dark here as well." Danziger pointed out unhelpfully.

"We'll catch up with them tomorrow." Devon assured Morgan. "Julia needs the rest."

"But what if something happens to them? I mean it is dangerous out there and it is not as if Alonzo is going to be concentrating on guard duty."

"Morgan I am sure that Julia's safety is Alonzo's primary concern."

"No offence Devon, but you are not a man and I assure you his primary concern will be much more primal."

"Morgan!" Danziger said. "Alonzo and Julia will be fine. However, if you keep pacing you won't be and as you pointed out Julia is not here. So there would be no one around to fix you."

"John." Devon chastised.

"No need to threaten me." Morgan said indignantly shuffling back to his tent.

"You should get some rest too Adair. You are still recovering. The last thing we need is you having a relapse."

"I won't." Devon said.

"And stop worrying about Julia, she'll be fine." He said before disappearing into the darkness.


	12. Chapter 12

"Alonzo. Where's Julia?" Devon asked noticing the pilot was alone as he came to greet the group.

"She's back at the camp site, she was just waking up when I saw you approach, which is just as well as she thinks you were riding in the Transrover."

"Told you." Danziger muttered from Devon's side before asking Alonzo. "More importantly where's the Dune Rail?"

"There are more important things than the rail." Devon said as she processed Alonzo's words. "Wait, Julia was sleeping? What's wrong with her?"

"Nothing's wrong she just needs the rest."

"But she's ok?" Devon pressed.

"Devon relax. Julia will be fine." Alonzo assured her, although the future tense did not ease Devon's fears.

"Where's Julia?" Morgan asked hurrying over and looking round.

"In the tent at the camp."

"Is she still nuts?" He asked resulting in a chorus of chastising voices saying.

"Morgan."

"What? You all want to know." Morgan said.

"She's fine." Alonzo replied.

"How fine?"

"Fine, fine." The pilot said irritably.

"So back to normal?" Morgan persisted.

"Yes."

"Thank god! I can finally get these blisters treated." He exclaimed before hurrying towards the solitary tent.

"Morgan." Devon called trying to stop him only for Alonzo to say.

"Let him go."

"But doesn't Julia need to rest?"

"Yes, but right now she needs to feel like part of the group and a doctor."

"Why wouldn't she feel part of the group?" Danziger asked scrunching his eyebrows together.

"Long story." Alonzo replied, not wanting to go into details. Picking up on Alonzo's vibes Danziger said.

"Well we'll have plenty of time to talk after we set up the camp. But Lonz why are we here?"

"Step this way and I'll show you." Alonzo grinned. Shrugging Danziger took hold of True's hand and followed Alonzo and Devon through some trees until they appeared in a warm clearing which was full of what looked like miniature ponds. Approaching the nearest one Danziger said.

"It's bubbling. Should it be steaming? What chemicals are causing that? Why are we standing so close" He added suspiciously.

"Relax Danz, it is just geothermal energy. There are hot springs all over the place." Alonzo said grinning.

"Hot springs?" Devon asked.

"Yep. They are all over the place. There is an amazing spring over there shooting really hot water about thirty metres high. But the best parts are these small pools of water. There are enough thermal jets coming through for it to feel like a Jacuzzi"

"What's a Jacuzzi?" True asked.

"It's like a bath tub, full of hot water and jets." Devon said staring at the tranquil suuroundings.

"You brought us out here for Jacuzzis?" Danziger asked in disbelief.

"It's perfect." Devon said smiling.

"You've complained the whole route that we are behind schedule." The mechanic pointed out.

"The group really needs something like this." Devon continued ignoring John.

"Because we haven't been sitting around doing nothing for days on end." Danziger muttered, resigned to loosing the argument.

"I assume it's safe." Devon said.

"Julia and me are fine." Alonzo smiled.

"Ok then. We should set up camp and then let every one enjoy themselves. John can you organise a guard duty roster so everyone gets some R&R?" Devon asked as she followed Alonzo back to the main group.

"I wonder why I bother sometimes." Danziger muttered. "It is not as if anyone listens to me."

"I listen to you dad." True said.

An hour later the camp site resembled a ghost camp. The tents were all standing, empty. Apart from Baines and Walman, who drew the first guard duty shift, the only other life forms in the camp were Julia and Morgan. Everyone else was enjoying the hot springs.

"Are you sure they are ok. I mean they look kinda infected to me?" Morgan asked again.

"I'm sure." Julia repeated calmly.

"They're not are they. I mean you are being way too nice. It is something serious isn't it? That's why you are being...well not you. Should I get Bess?"

"Morgan." Julia said in a raised voice, finally loosing her patience. "They are blisters. You'll be fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Morgan, you have blisters. You have had them before and will have them again. Your previous experience should have taught you that your feet will recover."

"But-" Morgan started only to be cut off by Devon entering the tent.

"Morgan, can I borrow Julia a minute?"

"I guess. I'll just limp back to my tent." He said leaving.

"Everything ok?" Devon asked once Morgan had gone.

"Just blisters." Julia answered.

"Good. We were getting worried about you."

"I'm fine." Julia said.

"Good. Do you fancy a walk?"

"A walk?" Julia asked. "Well I would, but I have stuff to do."

"Julia, it can wait. I'm not accepting no as an answer." Devon said sternly.

"Fine." Julia said knowing she was not going to win the argument. Standing she followed Devon out of the tent towards the edge of camp. All the while waiting for the lecture she assumed was coming. Finally Devon stopped and turned to look at Julia.

"What?" Julia asked.

"I'm just glad to see you looking relaxed and refreshed. Alonzo clearly has many talents." Devon said, causing Julia to blush.

"So how are you feeling?" The doctor questioned wanting to change the subject.

"I'm fine. It is you I'm worried about."

"There's no need Devon."

"Yes there is and I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Not noticing how hard you were pushing yourself. Not taking the time to make sure you were ok."

"Devon you were effectively in a coma."

"I meant after that."

"Devon, I'm fine. I just needed some sleep."

"Julia I know you don't want to talk about this and I'm not going to push you. But I want you to listen to me. You are an important member of the group because you are the doctor, but more importantly you are our friend. I'm asking you as a friend to take the same care of yourself as you preach to the rest of us and talk to us, to me."

"Fine." Julia said.

"You are a terrible liar Dr Heller, but for now I'll accept it. But we'll have this conversation again." Devon smiled.

"If you're finished we can talk about you resting." Julia returned.

"Morgan you should really go and try one of the pools." Bess said smiling as she entered their tent where Morgan was sitting on a cot. "They're amazing and relaxing. I would have paid to come here."

"It's a pool of water." Morgan said unable to get in the mood. "You'd really have paid?

"It a hot pool of water with relaxing jets." Bess said still smiling as Morgan suddenly developed a distant look in his eyes. "It is only you not enjoying it. Even Danziger admitted it was refreshing. Morgan honey, what's wrong?" Bess asked noticing her husband was sitting lost in thought.

"Nothing. I was just thinking we were not that far from New Pacifica."

"And everyday we get closer." Bess smiled, glad that Morgan was being more optimistic than normal.

"That's good. And when we get there it will be even quicker to get back thanks to vehicles." Morgan said to himself.

"Why would we need to come back?" Bess asked.

"We are sitting on a gold mine." Morgan said his eyes wide.

"Gold mine? What are you talking about?"

"This place, with it's thermal stuff."

"The springs?" Bess asked.

"Whatever, you said you'd pay. If you would chances are others would. We could seal it off and charge people to come here. It would be a relaxing vacation for them. God knows they'd need it with all the sick children, drooling natives and Terrians." Morgan explained as he started to pace.

"How exactly are you going to seal it off? You know what trouble we caused with the geo-locks." Bess replied, worried about what her husband was planning.

"I will just make a legal claim. I'll fill in some paperwork and neglect to tell anyone and it'll be ours. We will be rich."

"Morgan, for once please try to enjoy this planet without thinking about the profit." Bess said, her mind, however, was already running through some calculations.

As the group slowly dispersed to their tents as night fell, Alonzo saw Julia sitting on a ridge looking away from camp. Picking up a blanket he scurried up to the ridge and dropped the blanket over Julia's shoulders before sitting down next to her. After a few moments of silence he nudged Julia with his arm and asked.

"So, how are you doing?"

"Better." Julia said. "I'm going to miss this place though."

"Well then, we had better make the most of tonight then." The pilot grinned grabbing hold of Julia's hand.

_--Voice of John Danziger_

_As we get ready to leave this, for lack of better words, hidden paradise, there is a feeling of optimism that we are putting our toughest challenges behind us. We will never forget what we have faced and what we have lost. But we could have lost more and for getting through this we are all grateful. In merely surviving we have learnt just how well formed and gelled this group has become. In some ways that is a good sign for the future. But I can't help thinking that recent events have shown us just how vulnerable we are and how dependent on each other we have become. I fear what it will do to this group if we loose anyone else. For now though we can not dwell on our fears instead we do what we always do. Move on towards New Pacifica. _

_--The End_

* * *

**A/N: **I hope you enjoyed the story. Thanks to TesubCalle, TheNaggingCube and Joan Powers for the feedback.


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